Anna Wintour In Search of Two New Victims
We know someone perfect for the job!
Listen up, fashion-ites. The devil herself is loosing two of her three assistants and is looking to hire their replacements. Vogue is currently seeking two masochists willing to work in Anna Wintour’s office.
The following email was sent around about the openings:
Hi guys,
Sorry for the mass email. Two of the three assistants in Anna Wintour's office are leaving soon and Conde Nast is starting to look for candidates. If you know of anyone that may be interested in applying have them shoot me an email and I can put them in touch with the right person in HR.
Some experience in fashion or media is good. Smart, well-educated, calm, etc…
Let me know if you can think of anyone.
Thanks!
Hmm. We’d suggest Anne Hathaway, but she’s already had her time with the fashion sphinx – or at least a really good replica. Here are some other candidates we think Conde Nast should consider for the job(s):
1. Chris Brown: Do the crime, serve your time.
2. Christian Bale: How you do like being yelled at, Cris?
3. Victoria Beckham: She's desperate for the affections of the Vogue-d one.
4. Mickey Rourke: Dude needs to go back to the bottom. Again.
5. Guy Ritchie: In need of a new dominatrix.
6. Bai Ling: This girl needs some serious fashion education.
7. Lady GaGa: Maybe she can gank some pants from “The Closet.”
8. Naomi Campbell: No one messes with Anna Wintour, or her office.
9. Sarah Jessica Parker: Ms. Anna would rid her of those cloven boots.
10. Staten Island Chuck: Willing to bite to defend the boss.
