He Did What? When the Sparks Don't Fly

When even your Kama Sutra Kit doesn't do the trick, read these tips.

Why Your Guy Turns Down Sex

Men think that they are being totally obvious, but that's not always the case. If you've wrinkled your nose over why your guy isn't making fireworks in the bedroom, you are in good company. Here's the scoop.

1. You're a quick one. Even guys can feel pressured to perform, and the shy, sensitive ones--in other words, the keepers--aren't necessary gunning for headboard-shaking. If you are sensing resistance and you're wondering why, slow down and see what happens. If he steps back, too, you can start talking about what's up.

2. He's distracted about his career. Having to stress about money and promotions can really kill a guy's flame. Quite often, guys think of their virility as directly related to their professional accomplishments. Your best bet? Stay away from meaningful conversations right before bedtime.

3. He's upset or depressed. Clinical depression has been linked to a lack of sexual yearning, and if you suspect that your guy is depressed, talk to him about it (hint: do not use the word "depression," because it freaks guys out) and then try to get into counseling as a couple.

4. He's actually tired, not "tired." Contrary to popular belief, guys aren't gung-ho for sex after a day of battling the corporate world, taking the train home, grabbing a beer or kicking back, and then getting ready to start all over again. If your man says that he's too fatigued to get frisky, there's a genuine possibility that he is. Ask him why he's tired, be sympathetic, and then hope the good night's rest will prove to be revitalizing. Then again, pulling out the Kama Sutra Kit is also a welcome option, and who knows? He might just get a second wind.