New Male Birth Control Is 100% Effective, Lasts 10 Years

In their dreams.

Say Goodbye To Your Little Friends.

Sperm, meet your maker. A new birth control for men that kills your little swimmers before they make baby damage is reportedly 100 percent effective and lasts for ten years.

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Introducing Vasalgel, or RISUG (Reversible Inhibition of Sperm Under Guidance), the latest way to be a dirtbag and convince girls you're temporarily sterile so don't worry baby I can't you pregnant.

Currently under clinical trial in India and expected to be available in the U.S. by 2015, Vasalgel is a gel injected INTO the penis that coats the inside of the vas deferens (your sperm tube) and annihilates 100% of the sperm that pass by.

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And apparently the procedure is pretty simple. It takes just 15 minutes, lasts for up to 10 years and is easily reversible.

Of course, the weenie gel WON'T protect you from STDs or coyote ugly, so make sure you still keep a modicum of sense. Just because you neutralize one head doesn't mean you have to numb the other one.