Thrill Him with the Chase, Goldilocks
Available, but not too available.
Here's the sitch. You wake up after a night of bar hopping and drink downing next to a very tall, dark, handsome man. You've already done the deed, showed your true colors and bared your soul - well kinda. What's next? How do you continue the thrill of the chase without making him feel like his efforts aren't paying off? Here's a few ideas:
Calling: If you stuck around long enough to give him your number, he'll most likely give you a call.
You're trying too hard if: You let all his calls go to voicemail or you only call him back when you're at a loud bar or out with friends. He doesn't care about your crazy social life, he cares about connecting with you.
You're not trying hard enough if: You pick up the phone on the first ring and ask what took him so long.
You're just right if: You return his phone calls, and don't get crazy about phoning him. He has a life, and so do you. Show some respect, keep the convos short but intriguing.
Facebook: A wonderful means of non-verbal communication, Facebook offers a connection without making either of you feel like you have to stay in touch.
You're trying too hard if: You accept his friend request a week after he sends it. Also, it's probably a bad idea to upload a bunch of pics of you and all the random men you know.
You're not trying hard enough if: You switch your status to "It's complicated" before befriending him, along with all his other guys you met the night before.
You're just right if: You let him befriend you, accept his friendship when you get the update and leave him a fun (Short!) "Hey you..." message.
Texting: A friendly medium between a phone convo and a Facebook message, texting can open the gates of communication, without being a floodgate situation.
You're trying to hard if: You respond with a "Who's this?"
You're not trying hard enough if: Once he texts you, you continue to text him questions like "What are you thinking," "What are you doing," or tell him your every new location. Keep in mind, he's not your personal Twitter stream.
You're just right if: You send short but engaging texts and quit the convo if he doesn't seem interested.
Most of all, these tips are only to show this guy that, not only is you’re time important, you value it and yourself. Be upfront from the beginning. Don't play games and you can rest assured that, if both of you are interested in the relationship, it will continue.
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