Ed McMahon Hospitalized for Bone Cancer

Ed, in healthier times.

Oh no!

Ed McMahon, Johnny Carson's longtime sidekick on the Tonight Show and over-sized check hander-outer for Publisher's Clearing House, has been admitted to an intensive care unit in Los Angeles.

Ed's had a rough going of things lately. In 2007 he broke his neck in a fall and almost had his house foreclosed. More recently though he's been suffering from pneumonia and, according to a spokesman, has been in the hospital for a few weeks now.

Hopefully he pulls through this and has many more years of happy, healthy life ahead of him. No seriously, I've been waiting for him to show up at my door with $20 million ever since he tricked me into buying all those magazines. What am I supposed to do with 34 subscriptions to Bedazzler Monthly?