How Does Your Guy Measure Up?

You better put a condom on it.

From joystick, to killjoy.

We all remember the episode of Sex and the City when Trey asks Charlotte to measure his John Thomas, right? Well now, you can see how your man measures up without even using a ruler or a measuring tape.

A condom is now available, complete with a printed centimeter and inches scale right on it.

Now, before you get all crazy and buy every last one of these babies, remember, this rubber isn’t gonna excite every guy. Borderline small dudes won’t want this thing anywhere close to their shuttlecocks.

Case in point, this disgruntled male blogger’s take on The Condometric. He moaned, "The only people who will purchase these will be magnificently well-endowed men, who frankly shouldn't need to measure, and incredibly snarky women, who frankly shouldn't be allowed to.” Since we’re sassy, not snarky, we’ll pretend this little rule doesn’t apply to us.

And really, there’s no need to get so bent, buddy. As a wise (small) man once said, “It’s not the size of the wave, but the motion of the ocean that matters.”

We get it. No biggie.